nervous system

not sleeping well. not sitting well. hmmm...

I was listening to a lecture by Psychotherapist, Therapeutic Yogi and teacher Bo Forbes this morning. It was about the intersection of yoga and neuroscience. She is very knowledgeable and it is not really for me to reiterate what she has said.

However, what I was reminded of this morning is the interconnection between body and mind, more specifically that when the nervous system is in a state of engagement, the fight/flight/freeze instinct starts to kick in. The way that I notice this is that my mind starts plotting all kinds of strategies, exit strategies, conversations, plans, all kinds of things. I was so distracted by such thoughts this morning that I could not hardly sit.

But what is interesting is I am not practicing my physical yoga well either. Sometimes when I find it hard to sit it is because the body has excess physical energy that needs to be burned off (or so I think) and thus it is hard to sit until that energy is used. In such cases yoga serves as a preparation for meditation.

But right now that is not the case. Physical energy moves on the bike. But, my practice feels weaker than usual, erratic, and unconcentrated. Both the mind and body are in that maniacal state.

It is not all bad. This time is full of planning, imagining, visioning life into existence. And so that positive racing mind is useful, in a way, to those thought processes. But it just won't stop. Or when it does, it screeches to a halt in the form of absolute exhaustion. Not how I really want to be living.

So what the lecture reminded me is that the agitation of the nervous system, even through sitting keeps this energy going. I suppose sitting meditation, for the moment will have to take a back seat to some restorative work, where the body can truly, truly, release and relax.

The other part of this post comes from a reflection on watching a friend prepare for some travels. He is packing his life full of activities, wanting to get just one more session in before he goes, or just do one more workshop, see this person, etc. It struck me that I live like that a lot. Trying to squeeze, trying to hold, not wanting to let one more day go by without, etc. A phrase said to me by a dear old friend came to mind. I said it to him, as I say it to myself, as I say it to you.

You have everything that you need.

And I do. So this evening, tomorrow, bank holiday/memorial day monday will be coming to rest in that knowledge. There is nothing more needed. Energy flows, so I do not need to grasp at it. It comes, it moves, it supports me. I have everything that I need. We all have everything that we need.

Maybe that will allow this nervous system to calm and mind to steady. That would be welcome.
Om Tat Sat.
Om Shanti.
Peace.